Sunday, December 27, 2009

Autobiography: A White Life

For Christmas I got a hilarious book called “Stuff White People Like: the Definitive Guide to the Unique Taste of Millions”.  Awesome.  Anyway, there are a few pages with a fill-in-the-blanks autobiography template for white people.  Enjoy and feel free to do it yourself!

Scoring” +1 point for all accurate answers.  Award bonus points as indicated.

Autobiography by Jacqueline (+5 for two last names)

I was born in a suburb of Outlook.  I hated every second of it.  Growing up, I just wanted to be so much more, and I knew I would be a famous pianist in New York City(+2 for international city).  Middle school was pretty uneventful, except I remember trying alcohol (+2 for drugs) for the first time and getting really sick.  I should have learned my lesson then, but of course I didn’t.  I was so unbelievably awkward in high school, it was terrible.  I didn’t make things any easier by being part of the school band (-1 for sports team).  We were such nerds.  I was always so jealous of the cool kids and their parties, and secretly I always hoped I would get invited to one.  Then, one time in my senior year I actually got invited!  I was so excited, (random name) was going to be there.  I was so obviously obsessed with him.  When I got there, he didn’t even notice that I was alive.

That year, all I did was fantasize about leaving.  I got into University of Saskatchewan (+3 for liberal arts college, +2 for ivy league, +1 for state school) and could not wait to get there and completely reinvent myself.  My first year was incredible: I took all these great classes in Philosophy and Physics (+ 1 for each liberal arts, –1 for science or math, –2 for business).  Eventually I would switch my major twice (+1 for twice, +2 for three, +5 for four or more) before settling on Linguistics (+1 for liberal arts, –1 for science and math, –2 for business).  I played Muai Thai Kickboxing (+5 for Ultimate Frisbee, +4 for rugby, +2 for kickball, +1 for softball) in college and had great time.  After our games we used to go to this great local Thai food shop and I would always order the curry.  Too bad I can’t find a good one in this city!

I will never forget the time that I saw Thornley (+10 if music eventually featured in Apple commercial).  It was before they got big, it was incredible—so intimate.

By the time I reached the end of my sophomore year, I had experimented with student society involvement. (+1 for drugs, +3 for bisexuality, +1 for student government), and I made up my mind to never do it again unless presented with an exceptional opportunity. 

After graduation, I took a year off to teach in Thailand (+1 for work abroad, +1 for travel, +3 for volunteer/Peace Corps). It was incredible, I learned so much about myself and about life. 

There is more to fill in, but sadly this is where my autobiography currently ends, as the next few sections are about domestic life, home renovations, animal rescue and childbearing in suburbia after I have entered a career.  I guess that part will have to wait.

Sunday, December 13, 2009

“Joy Behar”

This person is clearly retarded, but their overuse of quotation marks is hilarious.

jewbehar

Even though she’s not Jewish, I still think Joy Behar is the reason persecute the Jews… and hate Americans.

Monday, December 7, 2009

The Minnie Saga continues

Minnie insists on being as close to Meez as possible at all times, even if he is sleeping and she can not.

After their nap, I decide to wash the bedding, I guess Minnie hates that: 

Thursday, December 3, 2009

Awww, muffin.

tlautner

 

Probably because of his troll face and shitty taste in movies.

 

 

 

 

(Sorry, Ryan.)

Thursday, November 26, 2009

Thanksgiving was LAST month

Today there are a lot of Canadians (living in Canada) with their Facebook status set to “Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”
No!  Incorrect!

And people wonder why we are referred to as the 51st state. 

 

Also:

Forgot about that one.

Thursday, November 19, 2009

30 Helens agree…

Americans against healthcare reform are evil.

This week I broke my vow to never read YouTube video comments and had another near-aneurysm. 

Maybe I’ve been lucky, but I’ve never had a problem with our health care system, nor has anyone in my family.  My dad had to wait a couple of months for shoulder surgery, because his injury was not life threatening, but to be honest, I’d rather wait a few months for something than have to sell my house and go thousands of dollars into debt just to stay alive.  Being that the USA is one of the few industrialized countries that DOESN’T have universal health care should be a red flag to all Americans.  In their “land of the free”, they must pay out of their pocket for basic medical care because a big insurance company has decided their “pre-existing condition” will take away from profits.  But hey, that’s the insurance company exercising their Constitutional rights. 
But what if there’s an emergency?  Well, get out a cheque book and a few credit cards, because those are even more expensive than your day to day care would be (if you were allowed to have it).

The fact that millions of Americans sit at home and worry that they can’t afford to get sick is despicable.   This is something people worry about in places like Thailand and Cambodia.  These are THIRD WORLD COUNTRIES.  Shouldn’t that mean something?

As if denying people this basic right isn’t enough, the US government is resisting any and all reform that comes down the line for a few reasons, the two big ones being

A) Money - I think it’s wonderfully ironic that the government doesn’t want to put itself into further debt to get healthcare for its citizens.  Millions of people who have either remortgaged or sold their homes to pay for a transplant or surgery will agree: going into debt for healthcare sucks. 

and B) Canada – This is the one that most often is heard, as the above video demonstrates.  I found a few interesting user comments which I would like to share.

greatrighthope” had this to say:

Canada became a socialist country under Pierre Trudeau.
I have family in Canada and it is not as bad as some of the commentators say it is - it is much worse.
The Doctors are good when you can find one and they will allow operating time. Some of the best surgeons in the world are only allowed one day of OR time a week. The problem isn't just the health care you can get but it is the fact that it is illegal to purchase private health care or health care insurance. That is the problem. Say no

How can your need become some other person's obligation? A person decides to become a doctor through their own effort and finances and when they graduate you are waiting for them to get set up so they can look after you. Why don't we do that with plumbers and mechanics? We need them too so the government sets the rate and you provide the projects. If they like it or not. Sounds like a plan. Or do you just want to reserve this indenture to medical professionals?

The first one isn’t true.  Tommy Douglas (recently named as one of the greatest Canadians ever ) was the one who came up with the model for our socialized healthcare, first in Saskatchewan and then for the country.  When people have their facts wrong on such a basic level, I know I should stop reading and go back to making brownies, but the plumber/mechanic comparison made me feel like I must contribute.  How can someone compare getting a new head gasket to open heart surgery?  So I answered:

You don't need a car repair or toilet plunging as badly as you need to keep yourself in good health. That's a ridiculous comparison and it only weakens your argument.

Of course it does not end here, speaking sense to YouTube commentators is like trying to be friends with your ex.  Don’t bother, it doesn’t work.  I know this, and yet I can’t let it go.

greatrighthope” rebuttles:

I am not talking about a plugged toilet. If you own a home and have a water main break you have no waterd the water is flooding your basement you really need a plumber. If you make a living with your vehicle and it breaks down then what do you do...how bad do you need a mechanic .we all have priorities. If health is so important we need to grow up and pay for it and save for it. A plumber for plunging a toilet? When do you go to the doctor? My argument is fine. Yours on the other hand...

This changes everything!  People need to take their cars to work??  I never thought of how basic a need that is!  I think I even remember it being listed as a basic need: air, food, shelter/clothing, First Aid, water (but only as it exists in a plumbing system in your house) and of course personal motor vehicle transportation to your workplace!  Rightwing conservatives (aka cheap “Christians”) are correct: having your car break down and taking the bus IS as bad as dying from appendicitis.  I mean, have you been on a bus lately?  Ew. 

Besides, Jesus never healed people for free.

Monday, November 9, 2009

As requested


It’s all for you, Lojo.

Friday, November 6, 2009

I am so sick of Mac

Seeing the most recent flood of Mac commercials brought on by the release of Windows 7 has given me one more reason hate Mac as a company, Mac products, Mac commercials, and Mac’s stupid, obnoxious, indoctrinated user-sheep who regurgitate every line from every commercial to explain why they’re so awesome and get to be part of some trendy, artsy super-elite swoop-sporting society.  I’m tired of it.  They need a new angle.  They need an original idea and a new fucking commercial.  “Windows sucks, so get a Mac”.  I can’t believe people fall for this. 

Simply saying that someone else sucks does not sway me to purchase the competitor.  Shouldn’t I also be assured that said competitor doesn’t ALSO suck?   They don’t even bother COMPARING anything anymore.  They’re so lazy and smug that they just say “Windows sucks, buy Mac”.    They don’t give a reason why, they don’t even guarantee that Mac is better (than an operating system?), they just point at Windows and make faces through the back windshield of Mommy’s Prius. 

I don’t like it, it’s getting old; and it’s about as unique and impressive as Mac’s fanatical fanboys.

PS – Did anyone see Dodgeball?  Didn’t Pizza-face Mac kid got hit in the face with a wrench or some shit?  Come on!

PPS - Does Mac realize that you don’t have to get a whole new computer if you want to upgrade to Windows 7?  Changing operating systems is not the same as being in the market for a new computer.  To be honest, I don’t really understand how these two are in direct competition: people don’t buy “Windows computers”.  Mac is pushing their computers, Microsoft is pushing their operating system.  Maybe it’s just me, but it seems like these are two different  areas of the market, PLUS I’ve seen people who run Windows ON a Mac computer. 

I’m not the only one who thinks so.

Thursday, October 29, 2009

Today’s Post is Lojo’s

There is not much I can add to this topic of Lindsay’s that could make it more true or thorough, so today’s update will be instructions for you to embrace the truth: 

Read about Relationship Resumes

Interestingly, I’ve learned on thing that works great.  I commented this on the article, but I’m going to reiterate it here:

The best thing we ever did was ignore the idea of "anniversaries". We don't know what date it was "official", we don't assign a length of time to our relationship, specific to day and hour. This way, month to month, year to year, we don't have the pressure of buying the perfect gifts, making a big gesture, topping the last one, celebrating our love. It's unrealistic to expect a party every month or year just because you're together. If things are good in the relationship, you won't feel like you need to verify it with an event, it celebrates itself at all times.
But try telling someone that you don't have an anniversary. See what kind of a look you get from them. They are horrified, and assume your relationship to be some sort of a building on the brink of collapse.
Of course we know it’s not, so it’s a lot of fun.

Wednesday, October 28, 2009

Saturday, October 24, 2009

Facebook is at it again

I blame the Republicans.

facebookjc

Thursday, October 22, 2009

Thanks for reminding me

There are a lot of reasons for me not to follow in Taylor Swift’s footsteps (not the least of which is my hatred of country and country crossover music), but lately I’ve noticed something else.  Whether she’s on the red carpet to accept an award that Kanye doesn’t think she deserves, doing a concert or visiting with Oprah and Ellen on a talk show, she insists on wearing sparkly dresses.
 

Am I missing something?  Should I start wearing a sparkly dress to classes?  To the movies?  To sit on the couch and visit with my friends?  Thoughts, anyone?

Wednesday, October 21, 2009

Quote of the Day

Ryan Street
“OMG did you notice we can "like" posts in here now too!!!! This is like Christmas but without a baby Jesus!!!”

Sunday, October 4, 2009

Wednesday, September 30, 2009

iTunes

I can't use iTunes, because I need my music player to assist manufacturing my nuclear, biological and chemical weaponry.

Tuesday, September 29, 2009

Just in case I wasn’t clear before…

Seriously?

Building a border fence would create jobs, which is just one more reason to START BUILDING IT.

Thursday, September 24, 2009

We need a border fence


OMFG, shit is going very wrong down there. (read it)

Start building a border fence, Stephen Harper…

Seriously though, a border fence. 

Now.

Wednesday, September 23, 2009

I’m not buying it

I’m sure everyone has seen some variation of this type of ad, but I’ve been thinking...  Eva Longoria is a motherfucking movie star.  Are we expected to believe that movie stars colour their hair with $9 drugstore hair dye?  Come on.
I’m not buying it: the lie or the dye. 
I’m not an idiot, L’Oreal.

Sunday, September 20, 2009

Milkless Man Nipples

Image025   Image022
Meet Minnie (above).  She’s about 10 weeks old now, and is the newest addition to the household.  So far, her and Meez have been getting along swimmingly.  Meez is constantly intrigued by her energy and playfulness, and Minnie is thrilled to have a big brother around.  They sleep curled together, acting as both each others’ pillow and blanket (see:left) and Minnie loves to play on the Meez.  Yes, that’s right: play ON him.  He’s very mellow and so he sits, stoically surveying his household while kitten-Minnie jumps on him, at him, bites and scratches his face, neck, legs and tail.  He’ll occasionally stop her, holding her between his front legs and clean her head and back, only to release her so she can rampage on with a nice kitteny soft coat.  It’s pretty much adorable.  But as I hinted on my Facebook, she has a strange habit…

Image023

On your right, you will see two sleepy kitties.  Cute, right?  Only on the surface.  If you look closely at the stomach of Meez, just above Minnie’s head, you’ll see some evidence of this strangeness.  Wet, matted fur that results from a kitten searching for a nip.  Minnie has taken to nursing on Meez’s Milkless Man Nipples.  The first two days of Minnie’s arrival, Meez was quite resistant to her advances, but due to his Bob Marley status on the relaxed and mellow scale, he no longer fights her.  In fact, he rolls on his back so she has better access. 
I wish it was cute, but it’s creeping me out.  I’m glad they’re bonding, but when I wake up with the cats laying by my head in the night, I don’t like to hear suckling noises.  I also don’t know what to do about it.  I can pull her away 50 times, and she’ll go straight back to it.  This is something Meez is going to have to do on his own.  The vet said it will likely stop once she’s a bit older.  And let’s hope so—at least when she’s a kitten, you can try to pretend it’s just cute.  A full-grown cat, though?  That’s probably mostly creepy.

Monday, September 7, 2009

Jack White looks like Edward Scissorhands

I think he’s awesome.  New video from the new song from his new album with his new band The Dead Weather.

Thursday, September 3, 2009

Today’s Thoughts

First, Meez’s paw is injured from a new round of fights.  On the plus side, this puts my idea for the Dr. House/Meezie show even closer to becoming a reality, but the downside is that he is in pain and hates life.  He especially hates life now that Matt got us a kitten friend for him [Asha], and she insists on playing 22 hours everyday as well as cuddling him every time he sleeps.  He’s annoyed and in pain, feeling slighted and mad at us, but I’m sure once his paw is better, he’ll love her and us again.

Secondly, I just want to express my joy in the fact that my boyfriend has never once beaten me up or given me HPV.   And no, this is not sarcasm: some girls really are that dumb.

BBC Believes…

BBC believes most people will have read 6 of the 100 books listed here:

1 Pride and Prejudice - Jane Austen - NO
2 The Lord of the Rings - JRR Tolkien - NO
3 Jane Eyre - Charlotte Bronte - NO
4 Harry Potter series - JK Rowling - YES
5 To Kill a Mockingbird - Harper Lee YES
6 The Bible--- NO
7 Wuthering Heights - Emily Bronte NO
8 Nineteen Eighty Four - George Orwell - YES
9 His Dark Materials - Philip Pullman - NO
10 Great Expectations - Charles Dickens - - NO
11 Little Women - Louisa M Alcott - YES
12 Tess of the D’Urbervilles - Thomas Hardy - NO
13 Catch 22 - Joseph Heller - YES
14 Complete Works of Shakespeare - - NO
15 Rebecca - Daphne Du Maurier - NO
16 The Hobbit - JRR Tolkien - - YES
17 Birdsong - Sebastian Faulk - NO
18 Catcher in the Rye - JD Salinger - NO
19 The Time Traveler’s Wife - Audrey Niffenegger - - NO
20 Middlemarch - George Eliot - NO
21 Gone With The Wind - Margaret Mitchell - NO
22 The Great Gatsby - F Scott Fitzgerald - NO
23 Bleak House - Charles Dickens - NO
24 War and Peace - Leo Tolstoy - - NO
25 The Hitch Hiker’s Guide to the Galaxy - Douglas Adams - NO
27 Crime and Punishment - Fyodor Dostoyevsky - NO
28 Grapes of Wrath - John Steinbeck  - YES
29 Alice in Wonderland - Lewis Carrol - NO
30 The Wind in the Willows - Kenneth Grahame - NO
31 Anna Karenina - Leo Tolstoy - - NO
32 David Copperfield - Charles Dickens - - - NO
33 Chronicles of Narnia - CS Lewis - YES
34 Emma-Jane Austen - - NO
35 Persuasion - Jane Austen - NO
36 The Lion, The Witch and The Wardrobe - CS Lewis – YES (Isn’t this one of the Chronicles of Narnia books?)
37 The Kite Runner - Khaled Hosseini – I TRIED
38 Captain Corelli’s Mandolin - Louis De Bernieres - NO
39 Memoirs of a Geisha - Arthur Golden - NO
40 Winnie the Pooh - AA Milne - YES
41 Animal Farm - George Orwell - YES
42 The Da Vinci Code - Dan Brown - - I TRIED, it was terrible
43 One Hundred Years of Solitude - Gabriel Garcia Marquez - - NO
44 A Prayer for Owen Meaney - John Irving - - NO
45 The Woman in White - Wilkie Collins - - NO
46 Anne of Green Gables - LM Montgomery - YES
47 Far From The Madding Crowd - Thomas Hardy - NO
48 The Handmaid’s Tale - Margaret Atwood - - NO
49 Lord of the Flies - William Golding - - YES
50 Atonement - Ian McEwan- NO
51 Life of Pi - Yann Martel - - YES
52 Dune - Frank Herbert - - Strangely, YES
53 Cold Comfort Farm - - NO
54 Sense and Sensibility - Jane Austen - - NO
55 A Suitable Boy - Vikram Seth - NO
56 The Shadow of the Wind - Carlos Ruiz Zafon - NO
57 A Tale Of Two Cities - Charles Dickens - YES
58 Brave New World - Aldous Huxley - NO
59 The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Nighttime - Mark Haddon - NO
60 Love In The Time Of Cholera - Gabriel Garcia Marquez - NO
61 Of Mice and Men - John Steinbeck – NO?
62 Lolita - Vladimir Nabokov - NO
63 The Secret History - Donna Tartt - NO
64 The Lovely Bones - Alice Sebold - NO
65 Count of Monte Cristo - Alexandre Dumas - NO
66 On The Road - Jack Kerouac - NO
67 Jude the Obscure - Thomas Hardy - NO
68 Bridget Jones’s Diary - Helen Fielding - NO
69 Midnight’s Children - Salman Rushdie - NO
70 Moby Dick - Herman Melville - YES
71 Oliver Twist - Charles Dickens - YES
72 Dracula - Bram Stoker NO
73 The Secret Garden - Frances Hodgson Burnett - YES
74 Notes From A Small Island - Bill Bryson - NO
75 Ulysses - James Joyce - YES
76 The Inferno – Dante - YES
77 Swallows and Amazons - Arthur Ransome - NO
78 Germinal - Emile Zola NO
79 Vanity Fair - William Makepeace Thackeray - NO
80 Possession - AS Byatt - NO
81 A Christmas Carol - Charles Dickens - YES
82 Cloud Atlas - David Mitchell - NO
83 The Color Purple - Alice Walker - NO
84 The Remains of the Day - Kazuo Ishiguro - NO
85 Madame Bovary - Gustave Flaubert - NO
86 A Fine Balance - Rohinton Mistry-  NO
87 Charlotte’s Web - EB White - YES
88 The Five People You Meet In Heaven - Mitch Albom - NO
89 Adventures of Sherlock Holmes - Sir Arthur Conan Doyle - NO
90 The Faraway Tree Collection - Enid Blyton - NO
91 Heart of Darkness - Joseph Conrad - NO
92 The Little Prince - Antoine De Saint-Exupery - NO
93 The Wasp Factory - Iain Banks - NO
94 Watership Down - Richard Adams - NO
95 A Confederacy of Dunces - John Kennedy Toole - NO
96 A Town Like Alice - Nevil Shute - NO
97 The Three Musketeers - Alexandre Dumas - NO
98 Hamlet - William Shakespeare - YES
99 Charlie and the Chocolate Factory - Roald Dahl - NO
100 Les Miserables - Victor Hugo – YES

 

Well I started out strong, but only made it to 25-27, depending on how you count it.  This just reminded me how bad of a writer Dan Brown is, and that I need to read something other than Chuck once in a while.  Maybe I’ll start making my way through this list.

Thursday, August 27, 2009

Oh, Google

I don’t even care if this is real:

Google Search Fail
see more Fail Blog

Tuesday, August 18, 2009

Two Update Tuesdays: Making New Friends

The other night I met a new person. While I was happily watching Iron Chef, Newbie reaches for the remote at the commercial break and is all, "Can I just check something else quick?" Of course, no problem. That implies he will take up the commercial break with a TSN stopover at the football game. Most Saskatchewanites want to check the score on the Rider game on a Sunday night, and although two years ago, this would’ve lost them a few respect points, now that I’m back in the country, I’ve mellowed. There are a lot worse things to be subjected to than a Rider fan. Anyway, that wasn’t what he was after: he turned on the PGA tour… for the next 90 minutes.

When we finally made it back to the Food network, some guy was cooking up bangers (sausages) in Guinness.
Newbie: "Ugh, Guinness."
Jacquie: “Guinness is my favorite beer.”
Newbie: "Really? Have you tried any others? Guinness sucks."

And then he took a swig of his Coors light--straight out of the can.

That guy dropped in respect points FAST. He lost 150 points in a matter of seconds.
*50 points lost for hating Guinness
*50 points lost for TELLING me about hating Guinness
*50 points lost for making me miss the Iron Chef

He's in a tough place to recover from. In fact, he'll have to combine quite a few of the following traits to make it anywhere back near zero:
*has issues with Thai people
*loves kitties
*world renowned physicist
*is hilarious
*gives me rainbow suspenders
*gives me no less than $100 000
*tells me I have an awesome car
*pays for my schooling
*gets FOX News taken off the air

The Police

After doing this:

roxanne

I enjoyed watching:

Sunday, August 16, 2009

Facebook Jealousy

I know a lot of posts have been about Facebook lately, but it’s interesting to me how people treat this social network.

This article was posted last week on a former coworker’s profile and I got a little fired up. 

Be careful when you surf Facebook, or your relationship status may go from "married" to "it's complicated," researchers warn.

The more time you spend on the social networking site, the more likely you are to feel jealous, according to a study from the University of Guelph.

It goes on to discuss specific cases of divorces and break-ups that are being blamed on Facebook, and it really made me smack my forehead.   People seem to be in agreement that Facebook makes it easier to cheat, so people are more likely to do it.

I feel quite strongly about this: Facebook isn't assisting or causing relationship problems.  Where’s the trust?  Someone writes something ambiguous on your partner’s wall, you have two choices: ask your partner about it or fucking forget about it.  It’s Facebook.  Chances are, a post like that is only going to cause you relationship troubles if you’re taking Facebook too seriously (which it seems like most people do). 

That aside, I'm sure the students at Guelph would've rather had a few new flat screen TV's somewhere on campus than have money put toward this ridiculous "study". I hope this wasn't someone's graduate degree research.

Bottom line: People who cheat were going to cheat anyway. Correlation does not equal cause. 

…perhaps there should be a follow-up "study": people who claim to be a victim of relationship problems caused by Facebook vs. their IQ.

Anyway, Facebook does have its perks.  I have recently gotten hooked on the FarmVille game.  Check out my sweet farm:

farmvilleoooOOoo

Wednesday, August 12, 2009

Tuesday, August 4, 2009

Is this really necessary?

Read here: http://www.miamiherald.com/367/story/1165325.html

A group in Florida known as Florida Atheists and Secular Humanists is sponsoring the erection of billboards sporting an atheist slogan,

“Being a good person doesn't require God,'' the sign declares. “Don't believe in God? You're not alone!''

I am interested to get some perspective on this from others.  Isn’t plastering billboards with your propaganda all over town making this group just as guilty as the religious nuts they so despise? 

I fail to see why what you believe needs to be expressed to the world, advertised and then forced onto others.  I can understand why it’s dangerous when religious values leak into the societal mainframe, influencing legislation and government, education, media and science. But why bother with the billboards?  It’s not going to recruit the fundamentalist religious crowd to your side, chances are if a “believer” is joining the group after seeing the billboard, they were already on the fence, and they aren’t the people we should be worried about anyway.

“The billboard may be working: About 30 people attended a recent Florida Atheists and Secular Humanists' get-together at a Davie restaurant, up from the usual dozen.

Over beers and burgers, nonbelievers, agnostics, skeptics and lapsed Jews, Christians and Muslims talked about everything from science and philosophy to politics and current events.”

Oh good, so it got a group of like-minded people together to discuss things.  I wonder how that went:  Let’s sit around and talk about our beliefs.  Isn’t it awesome how we all believe in the same nothing?  Let’s talk about why we believe this and why we’re right.
Listen: If I wanted to sit through lectures on what to believe and why it’s right and everyone else is wrong, I’d still be going to church with the Catholics.

Wednesday, July 29, 2009

Thursday, July 16, 2009

Traveling with Meez-related Update

June 30, 2009 – Packing to move commences.IMGP3026   Meez was obviously excited for the move (see: left), he insisted on coming with us from Thailand, and naturally we agreed.  

Our 48 hours of hell:
July 3, 2009:
3:00 a.m. – Meez is asleep in his kennel on the foot of the bed, his standard activity.  The front door is closed and he wakes up at the first movement, meows quietly, but hears my voice reassuring him and sits nicely.  We get in the taxi, Meez looks excited, pupils dilated.  He is trying to see everything out the windows, turning around and around in his kennel.  After a few minutes he sits again and waits.   Meanwhile, I am suffering the most terrifying cab ride of my life.  The driver is half asleep, the taxi is rickety, everything is rattling and it has trouble traveling highway speeds.  The lights barely work, and the expressway to the airport is under construction, but not well marked.  The only other vehicles on the highway are huge dump trucks with no tail lights.  Then it starts to rain: the windshield wipers barely work and I’m convinced my time has come.  If I had a God, I would’ve started praying about now.

3:40 a.m. – Against all odds, we arrive safely at the Suvarnabhumi International Airport just outside of Bangkok.  We load the Meez atop our [many] suitcases on the luggage cart and proceed to the Northwest Airlines counter.  I am nervous for him.  To put an outdoor cat into a kennel for 25+ hours of flying seems cruel, but leaving him behind is obviously not an option, so I swallow my nerves and present our passports for check in.  Things are going smoothly. the lady behind the counter even offers to change our seats around to put Matt and I together, as well as put us at the back of the plane so that Meez’s slightly-too-tall kennel can go behind the seat against the bulkhead.  Lovely.  They don’t even charge us overage on our ridiculously heavy and giant suitcases.  Perfect.  This is where things get stressful.  This is the watered-down version of our exchange with Northwest Airlines.

NWA Employee: “So I’ll need to see your export license for the cat.”
Jacquie: “Oh, Canada doesn’t require that license, so I just have this vaccination certificate.”
NWA Employee: “But you’re traveling through Japan, which requires additional documentation.”
Jacquie: “But we’re not even leaving the airport, we’re only there for 90 minutes.”
NWA: “Doesn’t matter, without that paperwork, we can’t let you fly today.”
Jacquie: “Fuck.”
NWA: “It’s ok, get a hotel, then go to the animal quarantine office and get the paperwork today and we’ll fly you out tomorrow morning on the same schedule at no extra charge.”

Ok, well it seems like we don’t have a choice, and luck would have it that I still have a free hotel stay on my Accor member card.   We’ve been waiting months to get out of Thailand, what’s one more day?

5:00 a.m. - We use up my free stay at the very clean, comfortable and classy Airport Novotel (not sarcastic, one of the nicest hotels I’ve ever been in).  I’m feeling a little guilty about the cat having to spend 24 extra hours in his kennel downstairs in the security office, but I visit him every few hours and take him outside.  

9:00 a.m. – I remove the Meez from his kennel and go for another taxi ride.  I obtain the paperwork, all the people in the office are loving the Meez/Jacquie duo:
”He’s so cute and well behaved.  I can’t believe you don’t keep him in his kennel.”
”You two look alike, so nice.”
”What a great kitty.” etc etc etc.
I know, people.  Why the hell do you think I’m hauling him across the earth?

12:00 p.m. – Back at the hotel, I’m calming down and ready to sleep a bit, but then the airline calls.  Long story short, I fight with them for a few hours because due to the July 4 weekend in the USA, no flights are leaving from Minneapolis to Saskatoon until July 6.  NWA refuses to pay for a hotel room for us for two days and Matt’s dad can’t be talked into driving 14 hours to hang out for a while.  I’m also wondering what we’re going to do with a cat for 2 days, because he certainly can’t stay in the kennel.  I fight a little more, demand I be delivered to Saskatoon that day and they better IMGP3044make it happen. 
July 4 – 3:30 a.m. - After some harsh words and a lot of phone calls, our flights have been fixed: they reroute us as far as Calgary, and my parents come to pick us up and drive us back to Saskatoon that night.  We arrived home safely, none of our luggage was lost and things are fine.
--fin--

Meez turned out to be a wonderful traveler and despite the fact that he spent two full days in his kennel being in and out of hotels, airplanes, airports and taxis, he still loves it in there (see: left) and sleeps in it every night after he tires of laying on my sweater cushions (boobs).

Now that we’re home, the run-in with NWA is a distant memory, but I will never fly with them again.  It was especially frustrating because I did my job.  I called NWA a month ahead and asked about what I needed.  I emailed the Canadian embassy to ask about paperwork and I asked two different vets what we needed.  None of this was mentioned.  There was no way I could’ve avoided this situation, no matter how hard I tried.  And try I did, I covered all my information bases...  

Meez has found his favourite spot to sit in my parents’ house (below left) and he’s got about 50x more energy in this cool weather.  His fur is soft and clean and he’s excited to be alive (below right).

                    IMGP3040             IMGP3037

Of course, my luck ran out again, and this was all too good to be true.  He’s adjusting very well, but he’s making strange howling noises in his litterbox lately.  It sounds painful.  There’s no blood in his stool, but he really sounds like he’s in pain when he’s in there doing his thing.  He’s not constipated, but a treat disappeared off of the countertop this week and we can’t even find the plastic wrap.  So I’m wondering if he’s got that as a blockage and it’s causing him pain during bowel movements.  I’ve added some flaxseed oil to his food, and I’m going to be switching him back to a mixture of soft and hard food this week, see if that gets things moving for him.  If there’s still a bit of howling, I’ve read to add pumpkin to his food, so I’ll give that a try as well.  He might just be lacking fibre and it’s making his stools a bit too hard, thus causing the pain. 
I’m going to give him a week to try and straighten him out.  If the howling doesn’t stop, a vet visit might be in order.  He needs to be neutered anyway, I guess.  To quote a beautiful lady, he’s been rape meowing all over the place every day.  Misses his Thai bitches, I guess.  We’ll be moving him to a new place on July 25, and after that he should have some stability.  What a trip, I hope that cat knows what we went through to get him here.  I regret nothing.

Monday, July 6, 2009

Couldn’t have said it better myself

Evan says:
well welcome back.  i'll give you a few days to bask in the happy glow of being in a country with english as a first language and where the sloppy socially inept idiots have to marry other sloppy socially inept idiots and not semi-attractive thai women before i expect you to be scorning all that lives and kicking ass again

Evan says:
see, problem is now whenever you want to really spite something, part of your brain is going to think "at least it's not thailand" and it's really going to take the edge off your hate

Jacquie says:
I know
I may have accidentally become a happier and more tolerant person

 

 

I’m home!!!  Meez loves it and was an excellent traveler.  Could not be happier about the decision to bring him.  Although flying with Northwest left something to be desired.  That airline should be avoided at all costs.

Thursday, July 2, 2009

I love Canada – Reason #277

Even though I laughed at what was said on Redeye, because I do have a sense of humour and it wasn’t all that mean-spirited if you have ever seen the show before, the part about this clip that I love is how it’s described as Canada being “outraged”.  The responses that the news ladies read from the viewers are so polite and well worded that it just makes me so happy to be Canadian.  Even when we’re “outraged” we manage to string a coherent thought together.  No death threats were uttered, no racial slurs were used, and no one resorted to name calling or bigotry and intolerance.  I can’t wait to get home tomorrow.  If you don’t see the big deal with how the situation was handled, I’ve included another video just to contrast, this is what happens when Fox”News” gets angry:

Bill O’Reilly should be put in a home.

Monday, June 29, 2009

Two of the WORST days ever

Yesterday (Sunday) and today have been two of the worst days on record.  This is especially disappointing, because after our last day of work on Friday, I was hoping for smooth sailing and nothing but relaxing and packing until we leave on Friday.  We were supposed to hop the border, because our visa ran out yesterday, but it turns out paying a few days of overstay charges was going to be about the same as traveling all day to the ultra-shitty Cambodian border, so we opted to just overstay our visas.  Anyway, crossing the trip to Cambodia off the list effectively removed the only potentially awful experience off our list of things to do before leaving.  Or so I thought…

Sunday morning started out excellently.  The cat was being super cute, we woke up early and Matt brought me a coffee in bed.  Then we spent a couple of hours talking about how much we love Meezer and hate people and fell back asleep for a late morning nap.  Then our landlord showed up and just barged into our house after calling us from outside 50 times while we were still sleeping.  When I went downstairs in my pj’s and expressed my displeasure with his rude entry into OUR home, he demanded that we go for lunch with him. No sense of boundaries whatsoever, I was [understandably] quite angry with him and told him no and was not particularly kind about it.  Anyway, it was true: we couldn't have lunch with him, because we had made plans to meet a friend at Future Park [local shopping mall] for 1:00 lunch to say our goodbyes.

So we went to Future Park, and it was ridiculously crowded, like it always is on Sundays. We definitely forgot the cell at home, but we didn't leave until 12:40, so I figured if he was going to call and cancel, anyone with common human decency would've done it before that point. So we waited at the Starbucks for him for about 90 minutes before we just gave up, ate and went home.  Not cool, I really dislike waiting.  We get home and there's a text message from him at 12:45 "Sorry guys, I'm not going to make it." Must have been some kind of top secret emergency he couldn't pry himself away from.  Instead just sent a passive aggressive text message.  Even a phone call would’ve been better, because then we would know at least he cared enough to be sure we got the information.  But we didn’t and instead wasted an entire afternoon waiting around.  We'll never know what his issue was, because A) he didn't tell us and B) I have no interest in making time for this crap again before we leave.  It wasn’t a complete waste, though; Matt bought some cool pants and I restocked on makeup.

Today started out very nicely.  We slept in, I got a cup of coffee in bed (again), started some laundry and then had a few errands to run.  We went to Tesco [Wal-mart] to get some cat food and water and grab some lunch, and there were two super cute shirts at a stall outside of the store.  We didn't have enough cash on us to buy everything and the shirts, so we had to run home to get more, since today of all days, I opted out of carrying my purse.  Then on the way home we got a flat tire, which we had to get that fixed.  Matt had to run home and grab cash (so we could pay for the tire fix) while I waited in the 42 degree heat as collateral on a $4 mechanic’s bill, and afterwards we decided to go BACK to Tesco with our cash to get my shirts.  Matt waited in the parking lot while I went to the lady's kiosk and, lo and behold: she wasn't there.  I waited 25 minutes for her to come back (I really wanted these shirts), but on our way back to the house, we ran out of gas.  So we "talked" to some Thais, and (from what we understood) they were going to go and get us some gas and come back. We waited about an hour, no one came back (apparently we misunderstood the situation) so we had to walk to Caltex and fill some water bottles with gas and walk back to our bike.  We made it home shortly after that, and at least it didn’t start raining until we arrived home safely, but I cannot WAIT to get out of here.  Hopefully we’ve used up all our bad luck now before our trip, and everything goes smoothly on Friday.

Saturday, June 27, 2009

Today’s Thought

I love it when reality destroys idealism.

Wednesday, June 24, 2009

Monday, June 22, 2009

I don’t even particularly like Matt Good

A super gay quote that I super like.

Good Love/Bad Love

I Fall Down. You Get Up. Not A Sound Between Us.
Good love is a few months. Of bliss, of nothing wrongs, of sparkle, of tight gripping hands, of the inability to get close enough.
Bad love is a lifetime.
Bad love is the greatest test known to us. It is our most prized pain - so sought after, so hard to find. Bad love is work, giving-in, compromise, forgiveness, the unflinching support for another even at their most humiliated, their most vulnerable. Bad love is not on television, at the movies, on vacation, or at the bank. Bad love is not in the church, the temple, or under the dome. Bad love is not all around us.
Bad love is what we find when we let go enough to actually be found by someone else.
                                           

- Matt Good, February 14th, 2007

Friday, June 19, 2009

Friendship Quiz!

Please take this quiz.  If you score less than 8/12, you should never speak to me again.

 

kthxbye

Wednesday, June 17, 2009

I used to have a LIVEJOURNAL

Hahahaha, I totally forgot about it until today, so I went back to see what my last post was.  It’s funny how as much as things change, they still stay the same.

September 24, 2007

I've had such a shift in attitude; and it's not so much a complete changeover as I find I'm acting more on thoughts I'd had previously but managed to repress. I hate people, always have, likely always will. The thing that's suddenly different is that I avoid being around them at all costs now. I don't want to go out, I don't want to be involved at school anymore and I sure don't want to shop or leave my house. I've become a bit of a recluse, and it's not because I'm paranoid or because there's anything particularly entertaining at my house, it just bothers me to be around people at all.

I'm sick of plastering a smile on my face and feigning interest in 200 different peoples' stupid, identical, inane, and sickeningly boring lives.

I so badly want to disappear... There are about half a dozen people in my life that I actually feel like talking to or seeing, and the rest I could not care less about if I tried. This all sounds so depressing and even narcissistic but that's not even what it is anymore. It's more a situation of how gullible, stupid and ignorant the majority of people are has really gotten to me, and it puts me in a bad mood. I hate it when other people put me in a bad mood because it makes me feel out of control, the fact that they get to me so much. It's like I see people out and about and all of their actions make me wonder "Why? Why would someone act that way? Why would someone do that?" and I get very frustrated.

Sometimes it's like I'm the only one that notices things about other people. It's like I see these details and things that everyone else blocks out and it's staring me in the face all the time. I'm forever noticing things that others are oblivious to and it makes me crazy.

At first, I thought I lacked human emotion, but I realize now it's just that I lack empathy.  I have feelings, I love kitties.  I will almost always lie to avoid talking at length to someone that I'd rather not talk to.

That was nearly two years ago, and it’s like I’m reliving this entire thing AGAIN, but worse, because it’s Thailand and there’s no escaping Thais in Thailand.  Seriously, Thailand lacks common sense even more than your average Saskatoonian.  Sad, I know.  Matt and I watched Ong Bak 2 a while ago and remarked at how, even though it was set in the 1400’s, it was like they just asked everyone to please turn off their cell phones and don’t ride their motorbike through the shot.  Otherwise everything was EXACTLY the same.  Now I don’t know if that’s just brutal historical accuracy on the filmmaker’s part, or if Thailand really is that fucking backwards.  I’m a cog in the education system machine here, so my educated guess is leaning toward “Thailand really is that fucking backwards.”

Tuesday, June 9, 2009

Facebook should give grammar lessons

Seriously, I think if they did, people might actually obtain basic grammar skills.

Today’s lesson:

Your = possessive

As in: Show me your boobs!

You’re = YOU + ARE

As in: You’re an idiot. OR You’re gay.

Were = past form of “to be”

As in: We were totally hammered.

We’re = WE + ARE

As in: We’re totally breaking up.

 

I really don’t think it’s that hard, and I’m really tired of seeing shit like this go on.  Lots of people will say, “Relax, it’s just Facebook.” But these sort of sloppy writing skills will leak into one’s everyday life and eventually show up on an official email or job application, or worse yet, a cover letter.  If you’re spelling the same words wrong time and time again, why should anyone believe you know how to spell them right at all?  How unprofessional.  If you can’t take the time to proofread two lines before hitting ENTER on your Facebook status, why should you expect to be taken seriously elsewhere? 
And don’t bring up spellcheck, either.  Spellcheck wouldn’t notice your/you’re errors or if you typed is instead of in, much editing is still required by a human.  And what if you’re in a situation where you have to write something WITHOUT using a computer?  You probably don’t want to look like an idiot in that situation either.  Getting into the habit of poor grammar, or simply not knowing in the first place, does not translate well into everyday life.  So take a few minutes, and familiarize yourself with the grammar rules of your native language, as well as a few basic spellings while you’re at it.

Monday, June 1, 2009

The Nuclear Debate

An article from the StarPhoenix “news”paper in Saskatoon is haunting me from overseas.  Bob Fink doesn’t seem to know what he’s talking about.

If you don’t want to read it, I’ve been so kind as to write a short summary:

The first part is some nonsense about Nuclear Power actually producing a lot of carbon emissions, the government and media are involved in a conspiracy to make you love nuclear power by censoring bad informaion, and some other “facts” that are probably not true and the last part is a bunch of information on the Chernobyl incident in 1986 Russia.

I have strong feelings for Nuclear Power, so I apologize if that comes through too strongly,  but I’ve tried to present true facts as they are, instead of doing as this guy did (writing with such a huge bias that it even makes FOX anchors like Bill O’Reilly a little nervous [seriously, that guy is a slanted, senile old man who will likely get a whole other post sometime soon]). 

I'm not really sure what Sir Fink-a-lot is talking about right at the beginning or where he got his facts. The processes of running a Nuclear Power plant generates no CO2, some CO2 emissions arise from the construction of the plant, the mining of the uranium, the enrichment of the uranium, its conversion into fuel, its final disposal and the final plant decommissioning. The amount ofCO2 generated by these secondary events depends on the method used (gas diffusion vs. gaseous centrifuge) to enrich the uranium and the source of electricity used for the enrichment process. So extrapolating, if you had an existing nuclear power plant powering the enrichment process, that would make the nuclear power plant itself nearly 100% emissions free.
I think what people don't understand is that nuclear power isn't supposed to be lumped in with "green" energy. It's just a lot more efficient than wind or solar at the moment.  No one is pretend there aren’t some wrinkles in the whole plan to be ironed out, but this guy just doesn’t seem to know what part needs ironing.

"Government and industry already have all these facts available, but pretend the reactor is still plausible."

This is laughable and just shows how much the author really knows about nuclear power.  NO ONE pretends that the reactor used at Chernobyl (type RBMK) is still a good idea. Not one educated person. There are still a bunch being used in Russia, but no one is building new ones ever again. That was Russian technology from the 50's and is considered all but obsolete today.

I'm not sure about all the Chernobyl facts there, but I'm going to give him the benefit of the doubt and assume he did some research, I’m too tired of Thailand to bother fact-checking.  Anyway, true or not, all of that information is totally irrelevant to the current nuclear power debate.  In fact, one of my biggest pet peeves in the nuclear power debate (besides people pronouncing it NUKE-U-LER) is when  Chernobyl is discussed.

Now, loving Science first and foremost and above all others, I will agree that there is NEVER zero risk, because that would imply zero probability of disaster.  And that’s impossible.
Always.
For everything.
That is just math--the probability of things happening is never zero, there are anomalies that one simply cannot predict (see: Barack Obama’s election to the White House).

However, I can say beyond a reasonable doubt, that the probability of a Chernobyl-type disaster occurring in Canada is INFINITESMALLY small. Using information about Chernobyl as a reason not to use nuclear power is akin to comparing the current working conditions or safety standards in Canada to Russia's in 1986 (OK, that picture might be a bit older than 1986, but still, Soviet Russia). We all see how ridiculous that is, so I don't know why anyone will accept Chernobyl as a valid argument against nuclear energy..

Nuclear power is not perfect, far from it. But the biggest challenge facing nuclear power today is NOT the safety of the reactors, it is dealing with the waste products. Wasting time telling people about Chernobyl isn't advancing the cause or fixing our energy problems by offering viable solutions.  All it amounts to is complaining.  The fact of the matter is that, barring huge developments in high-efficiency solar panels, nuclear power IS the best bet to reduce carbon emissions.

Following are stats for Sweden's Vattenfall plants:

The total amount CO2 emitted per KW-Hr of electricity produced is 3.3 grams per KW-Hr of produced power. Vattenfall measures its CO2 output from Natural Gas to be 400 grams per KW-Hr and from coal to be 700 grams per KW-Hr.

There's no pretending that isn't a HUGE benefit to our atmosphere.  Nuclear power makes sense, and more time and research should be devoted to nuclear waste management or recycling.

Sunday, May 31, 2009

Thursday, May 28, 2009

Thursday, May 21, 2009

I hate debates on gay marriage and especially when I forget about my pledge to myself: NEVER read YouTube comments

First point: No one in history has tried to change the definition of marriage, so why should we change it? I'm sorry Prager, but that's a logical fallacy. Ever hear of Appealing to Tradition?  It’s not allowed.  Why?  Here’s why:
The belief that witches and demons cause illness is much older than the belief about viruses and other micro-organisms.  Therefore, the witches and demons thing must be right.

Not that Perez Hilton is any better here. I am so disappointed that this ignoramus is being considered a representative for the pro-gay-marriage side of the argument. There has got to be someone better informed, less obnoxious and more intelligent to lobby for this. Somebody shut him up, he's not doing any good for his cause.

 


Some of the very informative comments included this gem:

eaglewillfly

I'm with Prager on this. What is the definition of marriage? The bonding of a MAN and WOMAN for life. That is the DEFINITION. It always has been. I have no problem with gays having the same civil rights- medical rights, inheritance rights, tax rights, etc. But society has a dog in the fight; if men and women marry, they generally produce children. Children become productive citizens (i.e.taxpayers) and help sustain the next generation.If gays marry, what does society get? nothing.
I'm not trying to sound cold to gays. I'm just outlining the hard, factual definition of marriage as government or society looks at it. If gays want to call their union a marriage, FINE! just don't expect the government to recognize it as such. governments are in the business of sustaining a society. gays marrying does not help sustain a society, in that sense. straight marriages do.

No.  Granted, they [gays] don’t reproduce the old fashioned way, but don’t we have ENOUGH breeders??  The people that oppose gay marriage are exactly the type of backwards thinking people we don’t want having children.  Wouldn’t they [married gays] provide homes for the children sitting in orphanages all over the world??  Besides, gays still pay taxes and contribute to infrastructure, education, etc. Reproduction to extremes is not the only factor in sustaining a society. In fact, overpopulation is one thing that can DESTROY a society. The most intelligent and ambitious young people who are straight aren't even having children anymore. The people with the most children are the ignorant bible-thumpers who don't believe in contraception and home-school their children, thus perpetuating the problem of misinformation. 

But there’s always an ignorant and bigoted Republican lurking to distort, exaggerate and misrepresent my position on every subject, which is (of course!) what happens next.

Onionsayswhat

our society doesn't want a society where men marry men and women marry women and we are not going to allow it. Bank robbers pay taxes at some point in their lives at times when they have legitimate jobs that doesn't mean we are going to make bank robbery legal. FOOL

Yes, it would appear that I am the fool here.  That analogy of bank robbery being the equivalent of gays spending their life together and wanting civil rights was genius.  How am I to answer such an excellent rebuttal?  I give up.

Anyone with an education and the ability to think for themselves knows what’s right here.  Canada was ahead of the curve on this one, and I can’t believe how scared people are.  I think a documentary asking ordinary heterosexual married couples how their life has changed since the legalization of gay marriage would be excellent material for the debate in the US right now.  Although it would be very boring, because everyone would say “it hasn’t, I actually forgot that they did that until the USA makes a big fucking issue out of it around every corner.”  Since Obama’s election, they’ve been one step forward and two steps back, respect-wise.

Land of the free, my ass.  The only people who are free in that country are the ultra-excessively-conservative right wing fundamentalist turbo-Christians (too many adjectives?) using propaganda and fear tactics to scare the ignorant and misinformed into shooting down a progression of human rights.  They seem to be free to ignore fact, common sense and the golden rule.

Oh well, at least since Miss California forgot how to love thy neighbour or judge not lest she be judged, and opened her posing-for-topless-photos mouth to monger some hate, we haven’t been hearing nearly as much about the economy or Obama’s big [half] black stimulus package…and for the record, I don’t think her answer “cost her the crown.”  She’s not a victim and she’s certainly not a martyr.

Wednesday, May 20, 2009

More Chuck, of course

 

Another great quote out of Chuck Palahniuk’s second-newest book, Snuff.

“Going to spring break at Fort Lauderdale, getting drunk, and flashing your breasts isn’t an act of personal empowerment.  It’s you, so fashioned and programmed by the construct of patriarchal society that you no longer know what’s best for yourself.

A damsel too dumb to even know she’s in distress.”

If you haven’t done so already, I’ll urge you [for the millionth time in the last 6 years] to pick up AND READ one or all twelve of Chuck’s books.  If we’re friends that means we think alike/I respect your intelligence.  So then I promise, you will not be disappointed (by any of them).

Friday, May 8, 2009

Thursday, May 7, 2009

True Blood – 4/10

Just finished viewing True Blood Season 1 and I am sad to say I am not impressed.  I really wanted a good TV show about vampires merging into mainstream society, I wanted it so bad.  But this one is not the one to make it work.  It’s mindless and poorly acted. 

First of all, I hope whoever coached these losers on their accents was fired. The only high points are a few of the supporting characters, 3 of 5 of my favourites were killed off by the end of the season (and one of them was a cat, to put that into perspective).

The whole storyline is contrived to revolve around sex, and nothing else. Sex with vampires, gay sex with gay vampires, gay sex with straight vampires, sex to score vampire blood, sex after drinking vampire blood, sex in front of vampires, vampire sex, non-vampire sex, sex cuz we're scared of vampires, sex because we're mad at vampires, sex because we just became a vampire, etc.

Nothing against sex, it would just be nice if it were a little more subtle with being peppered into the storyline. Perhaps HAVE a storyline and then shoehorn some sex into it. But they didn't even bother to do that... and Anna Paquin is a dizzy gap-tooth bitch. Either she sucks or her character sucks, I can't figure out which.

anna-paquin-bleeds-true-blood                      YEAH RIGHT || What?  Can’t afford dental work?

Another part of the storyline that I find highly implausible is why 150 year old vampire Bill who seems to have his shit together would be interested in someone like Sookie. She's constantly flying off the handle at him for things he can't control. He leaves for two days and she already decides that he's "not coming back" and suddenly has feelings for dog-man? Give me a break. She's supposed to be a 25 year old woman, not a 14 year old girl. People close to her are dying all over, and she's got the brightest smile on her face because she just gave away her V-card to some dude because she can't read his mind?  She acts like a crazy person, screaming at everyone and having little fits all the time.  She’s completely self-centered and monotone: annoying. Seriously, if I were a vampire, 150 years old and had lived through the American civil war, would I date an ignorant hick-town girl from Podunk, Louisiana?  Doubtful.  There are better (and hotter) girls worth my immortality.

As the main character of the story, I would've hoped the show would do a little more to make her understandable and someone to invest your interest in, not someone you keep secretly hoping gets killed off or put into a coma. I can't find anything about her character that I like and even the fact that she can read minds is impressively uninspiring and not the least bit interesting.

I will not be wasting my time with watching Season 2 come June.

TrueFail

F.

Monday, May 4, 2009

Ghetto Blaster

No one uses this term anymore except me, apparently.  But is it ok that I really want this?

Friday, May 1, 2009

Facebook has mad government SKILLZ

Vote on Facebook's Governing Documents

We’ve revised the two new documents we proposed to govern the site, the Facebook Principles and the Statement of Rights and Responsibilities, based on your feedback. Now, we want you to vote for the system of governance you think is best. Voting will close on April 23 at 11:59am PDT. Visit the Facebook Site Governance application to learn more, read the documents, and vote.

Tuesday, April 28, 2009

Harassment is fun

Following is the email correspondence we’ve had with the serviced apartment building in Bangkok we used to live in.

From: Us
Subject: Room for One Week
To: Our former apartment building
Date: Monday, April 20, 2009, 8:57 AM

Hello!

This is Jacquie and Matt [Us].  We stayed with you for about 2 months during the months of May and June.  We'll be coming into Bangkok during the first week of May and we were wondering if you had any rooms for us.  We would require only a studio apartment.  You were in the process of adding onto the building when we left, so maybe one of the new places would do us fine.  Your website doesn't specify what your rates for a week are, and we were wondering if you could let us know if a discount applies.  We were thinking that somewhere between 2000 and 2500 baht would be a fair price.  Let us know the rates, and we'll confirm a room with you.

Thank you, and we hope to see you again soon.

Sincerely,
Us

From: Them
Sent: Tuesday, April 21, 2009 8:35 AM
To: Us
Subject: Re: Room for One Week

Hi,

Sorry. We do not have rate for 2000-2500 baht per week. Minimum rate is 4000 baht.

Thank you.

SSV Team. [Them]

From: Us
Subject: Re: Room for One Week
To: Them
Date: Tuesday, April 21, 2009, 6:48 AM

Hello,

That is over half the entire monthly rate you offer.  We only want to stay for a quarter of a month (ONE WEEK).  You must be kidding.  If you aren't kidding, we won't be seeing you.  We can stay at the new Ibis hotel in Sathorn for the same amount of time for the price you offer.  YOU are NO Ibis.

P.S. I'm NOT an idiot.

Us

From: Them
Sent: Wednesday, April 22, 2009 11:53 AM
To: Us
Subject: Re: Room for One Week

The monthly rate is not including water and electricity. But weekly rate is including water and electricity. Ok. No problem. You can stay anywhere you want.

Thank you.

SSV Team.

From: Us
Sent:
Wednesday, April 22, 2009 9:35 PM
To: Them
Subject: Re: Room for One Week

I know how much electricity costs in Thailand.  I live here.  For a studio apartment it would be no more than 1500 Baht for one month.  And water is free right now.  [Thanks, Thai Government!  But we still can’t drink it]  So, divide 1500 by 4 and you get 375.  For example:  7000/4=1750.  Then, 1750+375=2125.  This is 1/4 of the monthly rent.  Why are you trying to steal?

Us